Earth's crammed with heaven
And every common bush afire with God:
But only he who sees, takes off his shoes
--Elizabeth Barrett Browning
11.22.2005
11.21.2005
here's to you, my ramblin' boy...
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Today it's been 7 quick, fun, excruciating, rewarding, eventful, long, wonderful years since Jonnie and I were married. In those 7 years, we've weathered some storms and shared many more joys. We made it through several years of schooling (and probably more to come?!); we've had two kiddos and wondered why we ever entered into this child rearing business, but also realized the joy we'd be missing out on if these two darlybirds hadn't entered our lives; we've owned two condos, a home, and moved 7 times; we've been to Europe 2x and Hawaii 3x and Utah more x than either of us can count...but the best times are when we realize that we are on the same team despite our different views and ways of reacting and handling situations; when we laugh at each other's idiosynchracies, our children's antics, and the occasional all-out laugh at someone else's expense; when we are working together side-by-side and talking about our goals and realizing that we're getting there! Jonnie-boy, the ride has been hard, thrilling, demanding, exciting, and worthwhile. Thanks for taking it with me. Looking forward to many more years....xo...
11.17.2005
What's a girl to do?
I'm in a funk...yes, a funk. Have you ever been there before? If no, stop reading now and never come back to darlybird. If yes, keep reading and then give me your best tips to remedy my situation.
No, life is not falling in on me. No, nothing really disastrous has happened. But nonetheless, I'm not super motivated to accomplish anything right now. I have millions of creative and artistic projects that, on rare days with free time, would summons me from any pit into complete productivity, but....hmmmm....I had a good 1.5 hour stretch with no chittlins at my ankles, and I really didn't do ANYTHING except watch a few segments on the TODAY show. I have really yummy and healthy meals planned for this week, but I haven't wanted to cook. Bring home Chipotle tonite, Jonnie Boy! I've tried to think of blog topics, but they've been eluding me. So I decided to make the funk the topic in and of itself.
The daily-ness of motherhood is sometimes hard on me; I can be fine going along with the simple plan and schedule until I realize that my life is dictated a little too much by naps, attitudes, and limitations. However, I have no greater joy than in my children and I would be sad if I had to take them to daycare every day. So what's the solution? I have no clue. These are a few of my current dilemmas:
1. I moved to Sacramento from Davis, and I don't have a real solid group of friends here yet. I know it's only been 5 months, but women friends are SO important to my life. I have a couple of friends-for-life types in Davis whom I try to see as often as possible, but with aforementioned kid schedules, it's hard to navigate the more spontaneous moments---which is what motherhood is often about.
2. waah! waah! waah! I just aborted mission and decided not to list these problems. I think I'll shift gears:
A few of my current reasons to be happy:
1. I have such wonderful, individual, and eccentric women neighbors whom I love:
A. June is hilarious--with her coifed wig, lucite and rhinestone jewels, stilettos, white shag carpet, and skyscraper skyline mirror at age 70+. I bring her dinners on random nights and she sings my praises over and over for it.
B. Monika is dear--she took Leah for a walk one night so Jon and I could have 15 minutes of free time, she is addicted to Sudoku, Rummikub, and Scrabble. Last night, she hosted a MaryKay party (I think mostly to be nice to her saleslady friend). Me, Monika, and Donna (see below) laughed so hard as we did facials and make-up. The MaryKay sales lady, Rosalie, told us "inspirational stories" about her experiences at a MaryKay session with transgender females in various stages of the transformation process. She didn't get any inspirational stories from us last night! Just three women in totally different stages of life, laughing their heads off at any chance. Monika is a widow, just turned 65, and ordered herself a plasma screen t.v. on the internet yesterday. She loves "whose line is it anyway" and I love her.
C. Donna--an eccentric artist who paints on purses, is really fun to be around. She is engaging, hilarious, and compassionate. She wears amazing jewelry, bright clothing, and the brightest red lipstick she can get her hands on. Donna feels for me and thinks I'm brave for having two kids--she chose not to have children and I respect her choice. She wants me to do my business and thinks it will be great.
2. Jon taped Gilmore Girls for me on Tuesday night while I was at book group. This is a small one, but I was so happy--I had forgotten to tell him to tape it, and was crushed when I realized it at 10:05 p.m. I arrived home and Lo! and Behold! he had remembered.
3. Esther is getting her two front teeth--and it looks like she'll have a gap rivaling Leah's. Hallelujah! I just love my girls!
4. My bathroom will be done soon.
5. Jon just walked in with Chipotle.
6. I get to visit Sus tomorrow.
7. Thanksgiving is next week.
Thanks for letting me spill....maybe next time I'll be unfunktified....until then.....
No, life is not falling in on me. No, nothing really disastrous has happened. But nonetheless, I'm not super motivated to accomplish anything right now. I have millions of creative and artistic projects that, on rare days with free time, would summons me from any pit into complete productivity, but....hmmmm....I had a good 1.5 hour stretch with no chittlins at my ankles, and I really didn't do ANYTHING except watch a few segments on the TODAY show. I have really yummy and healthy meals planned for this week, but I haven't wanted to cook. Bring home Chipotle tonite, Jonnie Boy! I've tried to think of blog topics, but they've been eluding me. So I decided to make the funk the topic in and of itself.
The daily-ness of motherhood is sometimes hard on me; I can be fine going along with the simple plan and schedule until I realize that my life is dictated a little too much by naps, attitudes, and limitations. However, I have no greater joy than in my children and I would be sad if I had to take them to daycare every day. So what's the solution? I have no clue. These are a few of my current dilemmas:
1. I moved to Sacramento from Davis, and I don't have a real solid group of friends here yet. I know it's only been 5 months, but women friends are SO important to my life. I have a couple of friends-for-life types in Davis whom I try to see as often as possible, but with aforementioned kid schedules, it's hard to navigate the more spontaneous moments---which is what motherhood is often about.
2. waah! waah! waah! I just aborted mission and decided not to list these problems. I think I'll shift gears:
A few of my current reasons to be happy:
1. I have such wonderful, individual, and eccentric women neighbors whom I love:
A. June is hilarious--with her coifed wig, lucite and rhinestone jewels, stilettos, white shag carpet, and skyscraper skyline mirror at age 70+. I bring her dinners on random nights and she sings my praises over and over for it.
B. Monika is dear--she took Leah for a walk one night so Jon and I could have 15 minutes of free time, she is addicted to Sudoku, Rummikub, and Scrabble. Last night, she hosted a MaryKay party (I think mostly to be nice to her saleslady friend). Me, Monika, and Donna (see below) laughed so hard as we did facials and make-up. The MaryKay sales lady, Rosalie, told us "inspirational stories" about her experiences at a MaryKay session with transgender females in various stages of the transformation process. She didn't get any inspirational stories from us last night! Just three women in totally different stages of life, laughing their heads off at any chance. Monika is a widow, just turned 65, and ordered herself a plasma screen t.v. on the internet yesterday. She loves "whose line is it anyway" and I love her.
C. Donna--an eccentric artist who paints on purses, is really fun to be around. She is engaging, hilarious, and compassionate. She wears amazing jewelry, bright clothing, and the brightest red lipstick she can get her hands on. Donna feels for me and thinks I'm brave for having two kids--she chose not to have children and I respect her choice. She wants me to do my business and thinks it will be great.
2. Jon taped Gilmore Girls for me on Tuesday night while I was at book group. This is a small one, but I was so happy--I had forgotten to tell him to tape it, and was crushed when I realized it at 10:05 p.m. I arrived home and Lo! and Behold! he had remembered.
3. Esther is getting her two front teeth--and it looks like she'll have a gap rivaling Leah's. Hallelujah! I just love my girls!
4. My bathroom will be done soon.
5. Jon just walked in with Chipotle.
6. I get to visit Sus tomorrow.
7. Thanksgiving is next week.
Thanks for letting me spill....maybe next time I'll be unfunktified....until then.....
11.13.2005
11.08.2005
11.07.2005
Leah and the Jesus set
I've known I was going to buy this Playmobil nativity set since before Leah and Esther were born. My sister Sarah introduced me to it several years ago and I knew that it must be mine someday. So this year, strolling the aisles of Target, I purchased the coveted Playmobil. It sat in my "presents stash" for a couple of months; Friday, after Halloween was well said and done, I noticed the nativity, and got it out. Leah and I spent an hour happily putting the robes and crowns on the wisemen, the regal gear on the camel, and set it up just like it is in the picture. As we were doing this, Leah said the cutest thing I've ever heard: "Mom, this is making me so happy it tickles!" I was tickled with her joy.
We placed the nativity set on the fireplace bench in the Peace Room. I laid down the law: "This toy is very special. It absolutely, positively has to stay here in the Peace Room." She responded, "Okay, mom." (That lasted only a few minutes, since she now somehow weasels taking at least one character with her to bed each night.) Leah was thrilled when Oleanne and Abram came over an hour later. They loved playing Jesus. Leah even figured out how to take the beards off of the wisemen and turned them into "girls." She pulled Mary's braided hair-do off and put it on the wiseman with pink and purple robes. Now she has two girls (Mary is OBVIOUSLY a girl, with or without braid, since she has boobs.) I imagine there was more than one woman there that holy night, so I doubt that Leah's "feminizing" of the story is really off base. The kiddos went out to the trampoline and were playing something totally different; several minutes later, Leah came bursting through the sliding door, not even stopping for a moment when she commanded Arinn, "Shut the door, Arinn." She was gone for a couple of minutes, and when I called to her, "Leah, what are you doing?" she answered, "Just checking on Jesus."
11.02.2005
Poison Control Moments
So I have some kind of funny/kind of pathetic stories to tell here...
The other day I was remembering some of the more notable moments of my adult life, when I stumbled upon some pretty crazy incidents in my memory rolodex, which have a common thread. That thread is Poison Control, and the victim is me.
1. Jon and I were enjoying a fun Saturday morning on 315 First Street in Davis. I was making oatmeal ginger pancakes; Jon was doing dishes. The recipe called for powdered ginger; I pulled two unlabeled spice jars out of the cupboard. They both looked yellowy/beigey, so I decided to do a sniffing test. Unfortunately, I sampled the ground mustard powder first. As I inhaled a HUGE sniff, Jon accidentally bumped me, and knocked the spice jar right up to my nose. The jostling of his bump, combined with my ultra-huge inhale, created an almost-fatal combination. "I'm dying! I'm dying!" I yelled. Jon, as I remember, was laughing. I was crying. Hot, spicy mustard was penetrating my brain. My head and nose were on fire. I was having an out-of-body experience. Worse, my anxiety kicked in: "am I going to die? Jon, quick, call poison control. I don't know what to do, this is killing me," etc....etc....etc....So after a 5 minute phone call to Poison Control, and a simplified description of the incident--"my wife accidentally snorted hot mustard powder...," I was assured that I would indeed survive and that all I needed to do was stand in the shower, head tilted back, nose in the path of the water for 15 mins. I came out a deflated prune, but at least I was still alive.
2. A few weeks later, I was working on a stained glass project and I happened to notice the bottle of the soldering flux. It said something to the effect of: "Do not injest. Will cause immediate and sudden death." (Okay, maybe it wasn't THAT forceful, but almost.) "Hmmmm....," thought I, "why would anyone ever want to injest that stuff?" Unfortunately, I couldn't find my trusty little flux paintbrush. So, I smartly used the eraser tip of a pencil. No biggie. All was well until two weeks later when I picked up said pencil and inserted eraser tip into mouth. (This is where I still fail to understand the irony: I NEVER PUT PENCIL ERASERS IN MY MOUTH! The whole thought of the rubbery texture mixed with the rusty metal totally grosses me out.) But, I happened to put this eraser in my mouth....and I noticed an odd taste. And then I remembered the DEATH clause on the flux. I started to panic. I think I might have even started to cry!?! (This was pre-Paxil, thank you very much.) And then I turned to the one person who could help me, "Jon, will you please call poison control?" This time my prescription was a few big glasses of water. That easy. And I thought I was dying!
3. This next story takes place at least a year and a half post flux incident. I was at home, putting the final touches on a delightful, yet time consuming dinner...(California Pizza Kitchen's BBQ Chicken Chop Salad, complete with homemade ranch, and corn tortilla strips.) I had spent at least 2 hours on this dinner and was really excited to taste the so-called fruits of my labors. Instead of frying the corn tortillas, I got a really good and health-conscious idea to broil them in the oven. That was a good idea until I totally forgot about them until the smoke was streaming out of my oven. I opened the oven door and flames--huge ones--dashed out at me. Instead of completely panicking, I grabbed the fire extinguisher that my dear dad once doorbell ditched on our apartment door (with some Twizzlers) to "extinguish the flames" of an argument we had gotten into. I heroically pulled the pin, and sprayed----RIGHT INTO MY FACE! I screamed, turned the stupid thing around, and put out the rest of the fire, spraying my dinner masterpiece at the same time. This time, it was just me and baby Leah at home. She was 18 months old and quite frightened to see me covered--and I mean TOTALLY COVERED (eyelashes, lids, lips, hair, nostrils), EVERYTHING-- in a film of white powder. I was quite frightened that I had just inhaled toxic materials and even started thinking about my possible demise. I took a deep breath, called poison control myself, and got my 3rd (and hopefully last) report written up. I showered for another 15 minutes (I'm beginning to think this is a common poison control answer), while my dear friend Natalie watched frightened Leah (yes, Natalie came over at a moment's notice). I dumped the CPK salad, hit the Taco Bell drive through, and still made it on time to my British Lit class at Sac State.
And you always thought Poison Control was for toddlers who busted into the cleaning supplies.
The other day I was remembering some of the more notable moments of my adult life, when I stumbled upon some pretty crazy incidents in my memory rolodex, which have a common thread. That thread is Poison Control, and the victim is me.
1. Jon and I were enjoying a fun Saturday morning on 315 First Street in Davis. I was making oatmeal ginger pancakes; Jon was doing dishes. The recipe called for powdered ginger; I pulled two unlabeled spice jars out of the cupboard. They both looked yellowy/beigey, so I decided to do a sniffing test. Unfortunately, I sampled the ground mustard powder first. As I inhaled a HUGE sniff, Jon accidentally bumped me, and knocked the spice jar right up to my nose. The jostling of his bump, combined with my ultra-huge inhale, created an almost-fatal combination. "I'm dying! I'm dying!" I yelled. Jon, as I remember, was laughing. I was crying. Hot, spicy mustard was penetrating my brain. My head and nose were on fire. I was having an out-of-body experience. Worse, my anxiety kicked in: "am I going to die? Jon, quick, call poison control. I don't know what to do, this is killing me," etc....etc....etc....So after a 5 minute phone call to Poison Control, and a simplified description of the incident--"my wife accidentally snorted hot mustard powder...," I was assured that I would indeed survive and that all I needed to do was stand in the shower, head tilted back, nose in the path of the water for 15 mins. I came out a deflated prune, but at least I was still alive.
2. A few weeks later, I was working on a stained glass project and I happened to notice the bottle of the soldering flux. It said something to the effect of: "Do not injest. Will cause immediate and sudden death." (Okay, maybe it wasn't THAT forceful, but almost.) "Hmmmm....," thought I, "why would anyone ever want to injest that stuff?" Unfortunately, I couldn't find my trusty little flux paintbrush. So, I smartly used the eraser tip of a pencil. No biggie. All was well until two weeks later when I picked up said pencil and inserted eraser tip into mouth. (This is where I still fail to understand the irony: I NEVER PUT PENCIL ERASERS IN MY MOUTH! The whole thought of the rubbery texture mixed with the rusty metal totally grosses me out.) But, I happened to put this eraser in my mouth....and I noticed an odd taste. And then I remembered the DEATH clause on the flux. I started to panic. I think I might have even started to cry!?! (This was pre-Paxil, thank you very much.) And then I turned to the one person who could help me, "Jon, will you please call poison control?" This time my prescription was a few big glasses of water. That easy. And I thought I was dying!
3. This next story takes place at least a year and a half post flux incident. I was at home, putting the final touches on a delightful, yet time consuming dinner...(California Pizza Kitchen's BBQ Chicken Chop Salad, complete with homemade ranch, and corn tortilla strips.) I had spent at least 2 hours on this dinner and was really excited to taste the so-called fruits of my labors. Instead of frying the corn tortillas, I got a really good and health-conscious idea to broil them in the oven. That was a good idea until I totally forgot about them until the smoke was streaming out of my oven. I opened the oven door and flames--huge ones--dashed out at me. Instead of completely panicking, I grabbed the fire extinguisher that my dear dad once doorbell ditched on our apartment door (with some Twizzlers) to "extinguish the flames" of an argument we had gotten into. I heroically pulled the pin, and sprayed----RIGHT INTO MY FACE! I screamed, turned the stupid thing around, and put out the rest of the fire, spraying my dinner masterpiece at the same time. This time, it was just me and baby Leah at home. She was 18 months old and quite frightened to see me covered--and I mean TOTALLY COVERED (eyelashes, lids, lips, hair, nostrils), EVERYTHING-- in a film of white powder. I was quite frightened that I had just inhaled toxic materials and even started thinking about my possible demise. I took a deep breath, called poison control myself, and got my 3rd (and hopefully last) report written up. I showered for another 15 minutes (I'm beginning to think this is a common poison control answer), while my dear friend Natalie watched frightened Leah (yes, Natalie came over at a moment's notice). I dumped the CPK salad, hit the Taco Bell drive through, and still made it on time to my British Lit class at Sac State.
And you always thought Poison Control was for toddlers who busted into the cleaning supplies.
11.01.2005
a few too many mini candy bars later...
I have a proposition; and I'm not sure if I'm going to do it or not, but I should. Last night as I ate my last of several mini candy bars (Take 6, Smore, Twix, Dots), I realized that the gluttony was too much. But, I was staring down a huge bowl of non-claimed trick-or-treat candy. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door and Jon answered it. Several older-than-ought-to-be trickers came to our door and grabbed the rest of the treats. And there were quite a bit. Jon came back to where I was nursing Estie and showed me the remains of the day--a few Smartie rolls and some Starburst. I blamed Jon for being a candy pansy; he told me one of them had been drinking, and I excused him of his non-confrontational maneuvers. I was still a little peeved that my chocolate stash was down to two (hiding underneath the Smarties).
This morning I woke up and remembered a crazy time back in college when I did not eat sweets from Thanksgiving 'til Christmas day; my sister-in-law Anna was my impetus....this was an ongoing tradition for her. I was hardcore. Even breath mints counted. (Altoids? I'm not sure....but I don't think they SHOULD count.) Jam? Maybe. But I was hardcore and stuck to my guns for the duration of those long 4+ weeks. And I survived!
SO back to this morning.....I realized (in a moment of strength) that I could try a Halloween to Thanksgiving TREAT OFF. That motivation lasted for a few hours, until I got home from being Leah's preschool helper and ate the two remaining chocolates. I got to thinking, after they were down the hatchet, that I SHOULD do this challenge. So I think I'm going to. This time, I might allow myself two free passes for events that are already on the books---Susannah and Nathan's donut party, and a baby shower I'm throwing for a girl in my new ward. But that's IT! Does anyone want to join me? You can have two free passes, too.
This morning I woke up and remembered a crazy time back in college when I did not eat sweets from Thanksgiving 'til Christmas day; my sister-in-law Anna was my impetus....this was an ongoing tradition for her. I was hardcore. Even breath mints counted. (Altoids? I'm not sure....but I don't think they SHOULD count.) Jam? Maybe. But I was hardcore and stuck to my guns for the duration of those long 4+ weeks. And I survived!
SO back to this morning.....I realized (in a moment of strength) that I could try a Halloween to Thanksgiving TREAT OFF. That motivation lasted for a few hours, until I got home from being Leah's preschool helper and ate the two remaining chocolates. I got to thinking, after they were down the hatchet, that I SHOULD do this challenge. So I think I'm going to. This time, I might allow myself two free passes for events that are already on the books---Susannah and Nathan's donut party, and a baby shower I'm throwing for a girl in my new ward. But that's IT! Does anyone want to join me? You can have two free passes, too.
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